73 more days…

I’m alone. I’m afraid. I have no one to trust. And no where to go… 

So I want to go away. Where is away?  Do I really care as long as it isn’t here? No one will care that I’m gone. And I want this to happen more that ever. 
None of my coworkers will care. Hell they probably want me to die. Then they don’t have to put up with me. My husband wouldn’t care. He wants to be with my sister so if I died that would be good for him. 
I’m so alone. I don’t know what to do. Where to go. Who to talk to. I’m scared. 

90 days…

It’s been a while I know. But the feelings are still there. Just had a few extra days of feeling like crap. 

I’m mad at my uncle for going through something i was so wanting to do. Since he did it I don’t want to stress my mom out with more stuff to do. 
I feel so alone. Like when people ask me to eat lunch with them, they are secretly not wanting me to come. I feel like an outsider, like I will never have a real friend.
I just want to be alone. That way no one will know. It’s just lonely this way. I don’t want people to know the struggles I go through.  I just want to sleep and never wake up.